May 14, 2009

Colony Grill

When we first started the Pizza Tour, many of this restaurant's rabid, obnoxious fans assured us that Colony Grill was the uncrowned champion and that we were wasting our time searching for Stamford's second-best. We've been told for months that we were unfit to judge any places in Stamford without having been to this cathedral of hot oil and cold beer, for Colony is the measuring stick with which to judge not only pizza, but ethics, morals, and the sins of man. While that's all up for question, there's no denying that Colony Grill is a veritable icon of Stamford, CT, and we're here to find out why.

Establishment. Colony Grill is a glorified dive bar and anyone who tells you different is an outright liar. In its heyday, Colony forced its patrons to stakeout their would-be tables in a cutthroat war for the next available booth, refused to distribute restaurant necessities such as menus and plates, proudly let the phone ring when they were just too damn busy to bother answering it, and took no less than 45 minutes to complete an order, no matter how big or small it was. They did all of this with the warmth and friendliness of Timothy McVeigh. While Colony has evolved ever so slightly from its bizarre, unfriendly (and oddly charming) beginnings, they're more or less the same. Sure, the renovated bathroom/waiting room area no longer resembles something out of Saw IV, and sure, their new waiting list no longer perpetuates the free-for-all sprint for a table, and sure, menus (if you can call a list of toppings and a bunch of drinks a menu) are now generously located at all of the tables, but Colony still screams, "dive!" Now, this can all be either interpreted as fascinating local charm or as repulsive, off-putting, local dickery. We are inclined to think the latter of Colony Grill.

Pizza. Fortunately for Colony, this is where they get away with being as annoying and unbecoming a "restaurant" as they are. The pizza's good. Colony's crust is so thin that you'll be baffled as to why it takes so damn long to hit the table. Regardless, this crust is dense, chewy, crispy (try and explain those last two), and the main contributor to the unique Colony flavor that you have to taste to understand. However, Colony's sauce and cheese are nothing short of boring. While cooked to perfection and very well proportioned, the cheese is largely flavorless, as is the sauce. However, no self-respecting Stamforder (Stamfordian? Stamfordite?) will ever recommend a plain pizza from Colony, as their toppings truly stand out. Our toppings of choice were Colony's famed hot oil and sausage and while there were only but six hearty chunks of local Deyulio's sausage topping a pie pockmarked with hot oil bubbles boiling up through the cheese, they absolutely made this pie. This should be no surprise, but Colony's ultra thin pizza loses its magic when it cools down and being as thin as it is, it sure cools fast and really caters to voracious thin crust lovers that can house a pie in ten minutes or so. If you're one of those people, Colony won't disappoint.

The bottom line. For thin crust bar pies, Colony is the place to go despite having a less than welcoming environment and literally nothing else to offer. However, there are better pizzas in Stamford.

Establishment: 18/30
Pizza: 21/30
Hits the Spot: 8.3/10
Large Cheese: $8.00

Colony Grill on Urbanspoon

awardSeal

AWARDS WON:

2009 – Tournament Finalist (6th place)

12 comments:

  1. I also hate colony grill. At one point it was my favorite establishment. But after being yelled at by my server, having cold pizza thrown at me after waiting an hour on a slow day, and then having my change thrown at me while I overhear the bartender talking about those "a-holes" on my way to the bathrooom. All of this because after waiting for an hour, I had the nerve to politely ask the waiter to check on my pizza (several other customers had arrived after us and finished eating). It was clear that he just forgot us because the pizza was promtly dropped on our table angrily and it was ice cold.

    I am officially boycotting this place, no establishment shoule be able to treat customers like this and be able to make money. I will take my business elsewhere. Upon your recomendation today I am trying outpost pizza, hopefully it will be the new go to place...

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  2. I don't know how you can judge Colony as 6th best pizza. Colony is a clear #1, there is nothing like there pizza ANYWHERE!!! These other places have boring crust or they are dry as hell and have crappy toppings. Ok maybe its a little greasy but thats what makes it sooooo good and there crust is the thinest, crispiest best tasting crust out there! Also where can you get hot oil or stingers on your pizza? Yeah there service is crappy at times but which place isn't? They know they have the best and they are not afraid to tell you, if you don't like it dont go eat there!!! Believe me they won't close down because your not returning.....This competition is subjective anyway but I'm going to break it down for everyone by type of pizza......Colony #1 all around pizza/thin crust(pepperoni/hot oil), Pellicci's #1 Italian pizza(cheese) & John's Pizza #1 Greek pizza(cheese).

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  3. Dear S.P.T. crew,
    Thank you for a very lively debate on Stamford pizza ! If you add a topping called "hot oil" the pie will be greasy. If you go on a busy nite the staff might be a little edgy. Colony Grill(JImmy&Bobo's) Is the best pizza !
    T.R.

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  4. M.J

    FINALLY!! Someone put Colony where they belong. They aren't the best...we're the best...and will never be the best. I couldn't agree with the judges order more. Great job on getting me to go to my favorite neighborhood restaurant.."Thats AMORE"

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  5. by the way ridgeway pizza,his father inlaw worked at colony grill for 20 years,thats rite 20 years,guess who got the hot oil pizza now and stinger,thats rite ridgeway pizza,i tryed it,excellent hot oil,much better then colonys,
    excellent thin crust pizza,thanks

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  6. Believe the hype. Colony is the best pizza in Stamford. However, it's a unique pie - the crust is so thin it's like a cracker. So, it might not satisfy a craving for the typical neopolitan pie.

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  7. OH PIZZA ,NOW I KNOW WHY YOU PUT RIDGEWAY PIZZA DOWN,YOU WERE SENT BY COLONY,NOW IT MAKES PERFECT SENSE,I KNEW YOU WERE JUST OUT TO TRY TO RUIN RIDGEWAY PIZZAS REPUTATION,BY THE WAY RIDGEWAY BEAT COLONY,JUST THOUGHT YOU SHOULD KNOW,WHAT A COINCIDENCE,A FEW MINUTES AFTER LEAVING BAD FEEDBACK FOR RIDGEWAY ,YOU LEAVE GOOD FEEDBACK FOR COLONY,COLONY PIZZA AT BEST IS AN OK PIZZA,FAR FROM NUMBER 1,THANKS JOE

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  8. BY THE WAY BIG PAPPALUZZ,RIDGEWAY NOW HAS THE HOT OIL PIZZA WITH STINGERS ALSO,JOE

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  9. TAKE THAT COLONY CRACKER AND PUT SOME PEANUT BUTTER ON IT,IT MIGHT TASTE BETTER WITH THE PEANUT BUTTER,TO PIZZA PERSON ON TOP,.....JOE

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  10. all this talk about colony,i will give it a try tomorrow,cant wait to waste my money again,lol,...tony

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  11. you guys have got to be kidding,that was one of the worst pizzas i ever had in my life,me and my better half ordered a plain cheese and 1 sausage,the only thing that tasted good was the sausage on the pizza,not the pizza,it was so chewy,i thought i was eating a bagel,im not gonna comment anymore,it was just terrible and so was the service,wasted my money again,i feel bad like i cheated on ridgeway pizza,lol,i cant wait to get back and order ridgeway pizza friday night,all colony pizza was an average bar pie,you guys at spt were nice to them to put them in 6th place,by some chance, when you guys scored them were you drinking there also,lol,good night ,......tony

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  12. I personally LOVED the pizza we had at Colony Grill. Nice, hot and spicy! I've been there a couple of times to down some ice cold beer and some spicy hot oil pizza! I would love to go there again and I've never seen another place that makes this delicious pizza. It would do WEONDERFUL in Florida where the pizza really sucks and they are in NEED of great pizza. TRUST ME ON THAT. But sorry some of you had poor experiences there. I guess these things happen at all establishments at one point or another. But if the staff was rude or incompetent, that doesn't mean the food is no good. If it were ME, I would have gotten the MANAGER and told him about the poor service, the rude remarks and the cold food and long waiting time. I'd demand to be compensated for that meal. A good business wants to please customers so they'll choose to return and to spread the word. Bad service is bad for business and word can get around and make or break a business. I am from New York and I would have brought that pizza right up to that counter and demanded to speak to the manager and gotten some satisfaction. (I would have walked out of there with a refund and a staff member FIRED for incompetence and profanity and insults).

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